Off the wagon

It's only fair, since I told you about losing weight and not eating sugar last year, to admit when things are not going so ideally.

In 2009 I lost 30 pounds, thanks to cutting sugar out of my diet, regular exercise, and eating a lot more raw foods. I got through the holiday season without eating sugar, but somewhere after that I made an exception for myself. I can't remember what or why. But after that, there were more exceptions. And a few more. And now here I am. My jeans are getting a little tight. (they had been getting a little loose) I can see that the pounds are creeping back in.

(real life moment: the battery in the scale died, and we have yet to replace it. I hate to think how many of those 30 pounds I may have gotten back.....)

Honestly, I am struggling with the exercise aspect as well, because my life is so busy, it is hard to take or find the time to do it.

Getting up early to go walking seemed like a good solution, except that I was so stinkin' tired every day, plus every night when I had stuff I wanted to do I had it hanging over my head that I was going to have to get up extra early.

With homeschooling in full swing, I don't really have time during the day.

My walking partner and I fell off of that wagon maybe two months ago. :(

I have a part time job caring for a handicapped gal, so that takes a significant amount of my time as well.

And then there is the fact that exercise has never felt like my friend. Yes, I was doing it. And yes, I was losing weight. But....so many articles promise that exercise will make you have More Energy! and a Better State of Mind! Yeah, well, not me. Exercise makes me tired. And hungry. and sapped.

Is it worth it to be closer to your ideal weight if you are also more tired?

I guess the answer is no. and yes.

Recently I did some reading in relation to adrenal fatigue (which I have struggled with for ages), and it pointed out that strenuous exercise and cardio can just make adrenal fatigue worse. Which makes perfect sense to me. No wonder I always felt like junk even though I was exercising 3-5 times a week.

The article recommended gentler forms of exercise, like pilates or yoga. I don't know how to do either, don't have any classes near me, and our TV died and we haven't replaced it yet, so DVDs won't help much at this point. (well, I guess I could set up a DVD on a computer....)

So, today I'm uncomfortable in my jeans. I've had some nagging health issues that I'm sure eating a less-healthy diet isn't helping. Something's got to give. I'm not sure how I'm going to approach this yet. I may just suck it up and be more tired and at least start reversing the encroaching fat. Maybe I will rig up a way to learn pilates in front of my laptop....

I will say that one saving grace (in addition to having an ever-supportive and loving husband) is that my baby step habits for living healthy truly do help in cases like this. Yes, I'm falling short of my personal wishes for how to eat and for being closer to where I'd like my weight to be, but there is still a lot in place that helps hold some of the lines. Smoothies are still happening. There are no sugary snacks in the house. Healthy meals are still happening.

The Challenge: Increase raw foods. Re-eliminate sugar. Find exercise that works for me, and find time to make it happen.

We fall down. We get back up. This is not about perfection. This is about keeping on and moving forward even though we are imperfect.

How do you handle it when you fall of the wagon?